I was on my way to riverbanks because my tita asked me a favor. She wanted me to buy ingredients for her tinolang manok to be served for dinner this evening. Being a dutiful pamangkin, I did as I was told.
I was on the chicken stand to buy chicken (ofcourse) and approaching it, I saw the one in charge (yung nagseserve) wiping the area clean. I was literally infront of it looking for thigh parts and then looking over at her for assistance. See here, magisa lang siya na nakatayo dun and well I think I'm huge enough that you'd notice me an obvious potential buyer spying your goods. Ofcourse I'd expect you to help me (saan ko ba naman ilalagay yung mga parte na napili ko? and nasa side niya yung pangkilo to get the price so does she expect me to go over the counter and do it myself?). She continued to ignore me kahit na ba tapos na siyang mag-wipe ng counter. So I called her attention and asked for what I needed. Sabi ko "ate asan yung thigh part kailangan ko ng tatlo?" In which she retorted while handing me a plastic bag "ayan, pumili ka na" while pointing with her mouth on an area somewhere on that counter top. Eh hindi naman ako bio sa premed ko so what the hell do i know with avian parts so I went with my instinct and asked "eto po ba?" While gesturing on some chicken parts. She looked at me and while cocking an eyebrow said "No. Yung kabila". As I was to gesture on another part of the counter she looked over and said with an annoyed look ah."Quarter yan. Yung katabi niyan yung thigh part"
Honestly, I was irked but said nothing. She was a lady and maybe she was having a bad day. And frankly, hindi ako yung palaban na tao. I choose my fights and I am usually a gentleman. My classmates and friends can attest to that. Hindi ako yung tipo na aggresive at palasagot unless I'm pushed to my limits. To tell you the truth, I'm socially awkward. I would always be guarded, afraid I'm being judged by others or worse laughed at or hated. I aim to please too much (even strangers) that it sickens me. I'm a teamplayer. Mababa kasi self esteem ko. I don't think I'm ever good enough so I always conform so that everybody likes me in general. The worst part of it is that I'm painfully aware of it. And I've learned to admit that to myself and to others. Your weakness is only a weakness unless you do something about it and make it your strength.
So unlike before where I would usually just hide myself and avoid confrontations, this time I chose to do the opposite. I planned and will be doing something about it from now on. We'll get to that part later.
Back to my story, so alam ko na ngayon kung alin yung thigh parts di ba. I was trying to choose some. Eh ofcourse as a mamimili, you wanna get your money's worth right? (Hindi naman pinupulot yung pera di ba?) and believe me what I asked for next is totally not to get revenge or anything. (Ok. Maybe a little.) Since she was just standing there, I was just. Well I wanted her to do her job and help me get the big parts so I asked her "ate, pwedeng ikaw na pumili? Yung malaki sana at medyo bago pa" I swear I asked politely ha pero the look she gave me was one of condescension. As in she took atleast 20seconds or so contemplating kung tutulungan ba niya ako or what. A coworker of hers seeing her reluctance (siguro) offered she'd assist me instead while they were both just a few steps (take note. STEPS talaga. As in one, two. Nasa harap ko lang sila). She (yung tamad na nagbebenta) carelessly took the supot from me and gave it (nonchalantly, medyo pagalit pa nga) kay coworker na nagalok ng tulong then turned her back and took 2 steps back to her spot (doing nothing uli) without a word of thanks (to her coworker). She even said "sige tulungan mo nga siya" ng pabalang.
The nice coworker helped me and basically did her job well so I thanked her for it. I turned my back and was about to leave to pay for the stuff I took. Pero my conscience was nagging at me. I mean usually I'd let her (si tamad) off the hook kasi nga I try to give her or anyone the benefit of the doubt and hindi nga ako nagreretaliate. In my head I felt like a pussy or a pushover. And I began to think, I've been doing that all my life. Being a pushover. Choosing to turn the other cheek instead. Basically being weak. And I'm really tired of it. Sobrang nakakapagod magkeep-up to what I think others expect me to be (which is basically be the good guy). Well I'm not. I get bad thoughts too. It's just that I choose not to do bad things (most of the time anyways). And I felt at that moment that I'm allowed to get angry or something. I mean. Wala naman akong ginawa para tratuhin niya ako ng ganun. I was being a completely good customer and I've worked in customer service business before to know what etiquette one should have despite whatever they feel or are experiencing. Plus it annoyed me that she might have been showing the exact treatment to others which is just plain wrong.
Oo. Aaminin ko. Wala ako sa posisyon na mangaral ng ibang tao about how they do their job or life in short pero at that moment I really felt wronged and I know I would feel worse about it if I just let it go. So kahit ba malayo na ako dun sa chicken stand (actually palabas nako ng riverbanks nun) I took a complete 360 and went back inside the supermarket. Nanlalamig yung kamay ko (which always happens whenever I do something which I normally wouldn't do) and I even contemplated on just talking to the co-worker and asking her to relay my message instead but No, I thought to myself for sure hindi maiintindihan ni ate yung mali unless sakin mismo mang-gagaling and I really wanted to get my point across and give her a piece of my mind. Like they say, if you want something done to your satisfaction, you have to do it yourself right?.
So I approached her and told her this (in a polite but "seriously listen to me" manner) (word per word ito) "ate next time wag kang tatamad tamad pls. I don't know if your having a bad day or what pero pls lang wag mo dalhin sa trabaho mo. I was being a good customer di ba? Pero ano yung ginawa mo? Tinatamad ka ba dahil hindi ako nakabihis mayaman or what? Simple lang yung hiningi ko at trabaho mo naman yun kaya gawin mo. Next time I won't hesitate to talk to your supervisor or kung sino man yung may ari ng mall and I don't care if I get you fired because frankly you deserve it. Buti pa yung coworker mo, yun yung tularan mo. Ok?" And with a smile on my face. I turned and left.
Honestly my hands were dead cold and shaking by then but I didn't let any of that show. I calmly left the building. Her stunned expression was already enough for me. So I didn't wait for a reply because I didn't need it. Suffice to say that I wasn't loud but I was sure her coworkers and some shoppers did overhear what I said but I couldn't care less. I know it was mean. But I don't regret it. People taught me esp sa bioethics class na you don't shame anyone in public but I say otherwise, especially if they had it coming. She was being a bully and although most people would say na intindihin nalang siya or sila. I won't. Not this time atleast. Ayoko ng namimihasa eh. Punishment is sometimes necessary. That much I learned from my parents. No wonder we grew up (my siblings and I) as behaved children. Hindi spoiled or whatever. We knew our place and we never overstep that boundary. So I think it was just right that I put her in her place. Besides, I did it nicely pa nga. i could've caused a scene or whatever pero I did it as civilized as I could.
Also some may argue na mali yun. Na babae siya, na mas matanda siya sakin and whatever self-righteous excuse they can think of but on my end, I'm not gonna let anyone play that card anymore. Hindi mo pwede gamitin yung pagkababae mo or yung old age or kung anong rason mo to do shit like that and expect to get away with it. Like sa LRT, yung mga hindi pumipila at sisingit nalang pag andyan na yung tren. God that pisses me off big time. In the end of it all were all human, lahat tayo pantay pantay sa mata ng Diyos and haven't people (women, old people, physically challenged individuals, people of foreign color, beliefs and gender) been fighting for equality all along?. So don't ever give me the bull that porket ganyan kayo you can get away with it. Maiintindihan ko pa kung masyado pa kayong bata eh kasi atleast pag ganun hindi pa kayo fully developed psychosocially to understand things pero really she was old enough to know that what she was doing is wrong. And I am old enough to know that what I did was right. So there.
So I approached her and told her this (in a polite but "seriously listen to me" manner) (word per word ito) "ate next time wag kang tatamad tamad pls. I don't know if your having a bad day or what pero pls lang wag mo dalhin sa trabaho mo. I was being a good customer di ba? Pero ano yung ginawa mo? Tinatamad ka ba dahil hindi ako nakabihis mayaman or what? Simple lang yung hiningi ko at trabaho mo naman yun kaya gawin mo. Next time I won't hesitate to talk to your supervisor or kung sino man yung may ari ng mall and I don't care if I get you fired because frankly you deserve it. Buti pa yung coworker mo, yun yung tularan mo. Ok?" And with a smile on my face. I turned and left.
Honestly my hands were dead cold and shaking by then but I didn't let any of that show. I calmly left the building. Her stunned expression was already enough for me. So I didn't wait for a reply because I didn't need it. Suffice to say that I wasn't loud but I was sure her coworkers and some shoppers did overhear what I said but I couldn't care less. I know it was mean. But I don't regret it. People taught me esp sa bioethics class na you don't shame anyone in public but I say otherwise, especially if they had it coming. She was being a bully and although most people would say na intindihin nalang siya or sila. I won't. Not this time atleast. Ayoko ng namimihasa eh. Punishment is sometimes necessary. That much I learned from my parents. No wonder we grew up (my siblings and I) as behaved children. Hindi spoiled or whatever. We knew our place and we never overstep that boundary. So I think it was just right that I put her in her place. Besides, I did it nicely pa nga. i could've caused a scene or whatever pero I did it as civilized as I could.
Also some may argue na mali yun. Na babae siya, na mas matanda siya sakin and whatever self-righteous excuse they can think of but on my end, I'm not gonna let anyone play that card anymore. Hindi mo pwede gamitin yung pagkababae mo or yung old age or kung anong rason mo to do shit like that and expect to get away with it. Like sa LRT, yung mga hindi pumipila at sisingit nalang pag andyan na yung tren. God that pisses me off big time. In the end of it all were all human, lahat tayo pantay pantay sa mata ng Diyos and haven't people (women, old people, physically challenged individuals, people of foreign color, beliefs and gender) been fighting for equality all along?. So don't ever give me the bull that porket ganyan kayo you can get away with it. Maiintindihan ko pa kung masyado pa kayong bata eh kasi atleast pag ganun hindi pa kayo fully developed psychosocially to understand things pero really she was old enough to know that what she was doing is wrong. And I am old enough to know that what I did was right. So there.
I didn't do it perfectly. But I know I did it in the best way I can and could've and I am proud of myself for that.
People grow old. But that doesn't mean they mature when they do.
People grow old. But that doesn't mean they mature when they do.
